Man Talk – Young Men cheat for sex – older men cheat for intimacy

July 26, 2010

The call of God creates conflict in your life. FACT. The kind of conflict that comes because one is so aware of one’s humanity and frailty and yet have this drive to do His will. With this comes the tension in that people see the gift or the amount of gifting that one has – and yet you know who you are. There is a difference between you and your gift.

When God calls you to do anything he gives you a gift and the gift is perfect. There is no need to pray about the gift because the gift is given. However you do have to struggle with who YOU are. Because if you do not work on the one that holds the gift, you will destroy what God has given you. What is visible to everyone else is the talent and the treasure but you face the man in the mirror. You’re human somewhere. Within all of us there are weaknesses and it is those that we must manage. One must accept that one is human WITHOUT giving an occasion for the flesh. You have to live with the fact that you are human without allowing yourself liberties that you are not supposed to have. That takes courage. As one walks with God through the different stages in life one faces different challenges. The battles that are faced by a 17 year old young man are different to those faced by a 36 year old or a 53 year old. What is common in that there is opposition but the key difference is young men and old men fight different battles. Bishop TD Jakes observed on one occasion that YOUNG MEN CHEAT FOR SEX, BUT OLDER MEN CHEAT FOR INTIMACY. The action is seemingly the same, but the battles are entirely different. One has to be able to understand what stage they are at in order to equip themselves effectively with the weapons necessary to win the battles. This then raises the question – HOW DOES ONE FIND BALANCE?

On the journey one goes through seasons where you are doing well in your walk but one has to be careful about the peaks because you will say things on the peak that you will struggle to live up to in the valley. There are days when you feel so spiritual that you can‘t understand why anyone would fall over into things that you wouldn’t because you are strong in that area. Then there are days when there voices in your head that are telling you that there is no God. It becomes fundamental on the journey to understand that it is not the ups or the downs but it is steadiness that will allow you to pull through. The ability to have balance and to be stable despite the highs or the lows will be the mark of maturity. WHAT DO YOU THINK?

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2 Responses to “Man Talk – Young Men cheat for sex – older men cheat for intimacy”

  1. Scott Gould Says:

    Yeah, the call creates major Conflict!

  2. Amy Says:

    I love this. So true. I read Mere Christianity recently and you echo CS Lewis’ sentiments. The beauty of grace is even when we stumble, God calls us back to Him. And back again. And back again. And as we stumble and crawl back to Him, there are lessons we learn as well – we can’t fight this conflict alone. We need Him to overcome.


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